Father's Day

Another Hallmark Moment

Growing up there were three holidays around my house that were referred to as the ones invented by the greeting card companies. Valentine's Day, Mother's Day and Father's Day. I still joke that my mother considers Mother's day a capitalist plot to guilt people into spending their money on needless consumer products.

All joking aside though I find both Mother's and Father's Day ridiculous. What's the point anyway? To recognize our parents for a job well done? Give me a break. As if one day a year is going to make a difference for ignoring them for a year. Buying a woman flowers on a Sunday in May is not much compensation if she's been slaving for the other 364 without notice.

Then there's fathers. Our whole bloody society rotates around men anyway. It's not called patriarchal for nothing. Father Knows Best. Wait 'Till Your Father Gets Home. Father Of The Bride. Our Father Who Art In Heaven.

What about the people who's relationship with either one of their parents suck. How's this going to make you feel seeing all these ads with happy families. Like crap because your not like everyone else that's how.

Then there are the people without children. Especially for women the pressure on them to fulfill their wifely duty to procreate is ridiculous. You've got a womb use it seems to be the attitude that's propagated by this holiday. If you don't have the maternal instinct your seen as some kind of freak. There are more ways in this world that a woman can create then by giving birth to a child, but no one seems to recognize this fact.

I know a young man who barely knows his father. Any time he has attempted to establish contact he has been rebuffed. How does a day like today make him feel?

There's this damn illusion that was created by American television in the sixties about the ideal family. This has been latched on to by social conservatives as the traditional family of their family values shtick. Ironically this model has only existed since post world war two which was the first time wives were actually turned into house slaves. What about the other traditions of family? Did they get obliterated with the passage of time?

Maybe I'm just a bitter fart about the whole issue because my dad was a total shit. The only things I have to thank him for are a series substance abuse problem which lasted for twenty years, on again off again therapy for the past twelve years, and a permanent chronic pain condition caused by being forcibly anal raped for eight years as a child. Probably not the best frame of mind to be objective about things like father's day.

But here's the thing. All these proponents of sentimental holidays that celebrate something that may or may not exist never think about reality. I'm sure there are plenty of happy families in this world, but if they are truly happy why would they need something as silly to celebrate their love for each other as a single day in the year when they buy a present?

The only purpose these holidays serve as far as I can tell are to make those of us not party to them feel miserable.

cheers gypsyman


Anonymous Eri said...

as far as I'm concerned everyday marked on the calendar as anything other than, for example "Wednesday" does something to dis-include more people than it includes.
This is why I believe we should celebrate our birthdays - period - and not because 'someone brought us into the world' - I know alot of people that have felt that burden.
We should celebrate our individual birthdays - because we are alive, we are here - because in the great mystery of things 'we chose to be here' and struggle to make the best of it.
That should be celebrated - and don't wait for anyone else to recognize it
Celebrate yourself.

8:24 a.m.  

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